Since I am SO FREAKING BAD at updating Instant Lo, you all should check out my friend Chelsy’s blog! It’s comedy gold!
Me: *talking about nothing*
Chelsy: I didn’t mean to tune you out, by I totally just did a little.
In the midst of game night, Kate passionately recited Maximus’s big reveal speech from Gladiator, word-for-word. I’ve never been more proud of someone than I was of her in that moment.
“My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.”
“Oh thank god, there is cream inside.” — Shmo
“I mean, I’m pretty great, but I’m not “grilled ham and cheese” great.” — Chelsy
Me: I love berries!
Colby: My dad’s name is Barry.
Chelsy: I don’t know what you want me to do with this information.
“Basically, he just figures out your weakness and then Ctrl+Fs to find it.” — Chelsy
“My first choice for my brain’s name would be, like, Night Hawk or something rad” — Chelsy
Me: (checking my lipstick in the mirror) Man, this lip primer may have been expensive, but it was worth it.
Chelsy: (mutters under her breath) You have a problem.
Me: What was that?
Chelsy: (smiles) Nothing.
It’s pronounced Ree-ooh, but before it was dubbed, a lot of Americans pronounced it Ry-ooh….because we speak English…and it’s not our fault. — Tyler
I’m like, 90 percent sure I have a beard hair stuck in my gums. — Trevor